WHO ATTACKED COMMISSIONER VON JOHNSON?
Thursday, September 14th, 2006 * 3:59PM


Rumors are running wild as to the final report coming from the MWF Board of Directors as to who attacked Dr. Von Johnson on March 25th.  The commissioner claims he was attacked leaving the Braintree Moose Lodge in Braintree, MA after an MWF live event.  Von Johnson has provided medical documentation from that proving he indeed suffered injuries but no one in Braintree can back up his story.

Von Johnson has a long list of enemies, any of which could have a reason to want to injure him.  Here are just a few:

RALPH LANO - an enemy of Von Johnson's since the MWF opened it's doors in 2001.  The Commissioner hired both Rick Fuller and Gino Martino to destroy Lano but the self proclaimed "Big Shot" kept coming back for more.  After a tour of Iraq, he returned at MWF SOUL SURVIVOR III only to be fired by Von Johnson at CHRISTMAS CLASH.

KARL LAUER - Von Johnson's dislike/jealousy of CAC Vice President Karl Lauer has evolved over the past few years.  The commissioner bought a cauliflower from a grocery store and deemed him "Jurassic Karl," and the verbal jabs didn't end there.  Dr. Von Johnson was reportedly fuming when he learned that Lauer will have a monthly segment on MWF Xtra.

LEO VENIS - Venis' MWF run barely lasted five months thanks to the Commissioner's hatred.  "The Crafty Veteran" was thrashed in each of his MWF encounters until he was canned by the Commish and Johnny Fabulous on Christmas night.

APRIL HUNTER - Dr. Von Johnson might not hate April Hunter, but he's been obsessed with her for years.  In December 2001, he put together a Millennium Girl contest to lure April into the ring in a bikini and seduce her.  He wound up getting a low blow from her and left in the middle of the ring looking like fool.  Ever since, he's claimed that she's really a man with a penis.

THE WIDOWMAKER - While recent times have been peaceful, the commissioner banished The Widowmaker from the MWF after a heated incident the two had in December 2001.

JASON 'RUMBLE' - 'Rumble' was tossed by Dr. Von Johnson in February 2003 after breaking one of his rules and has had nothing but disparaging remarks to make about him ever since.  'Rumble' didn't return to the MWF until July of this year but he would have had plenty of reason to want to lay the commissioner out.

PAUL BEARER - Von Johnson's dislike of Percy Pringle III / Paul Bearer began after rumors swirled that he was going to replace him as commissioner last January.  In reality, Bearer had no interest in becoming commissioner and made Von Johnson look like a fool at SOUL SURVIVOR III when he swerved everyone and joined "Sudden Impact" Dylan Kage as the leader of The Trifecta.

OX BAKER - Ox is another long time enemy of the doctor.  On a January 2003 episode of MWF Xtra, Baker used his famed heart punch (the same move that killed two wrestlers) in studio after stalking him earlier in the afternoon.  The commish has gone out of his way to make Ox's life difficult ever since.

GINO MARTINO - the commissioner's love affair didn't last long with Martino.  After Martino came close to crippling Ralph Lano in October 2002, Von Johnson took joy in screwing with him.  Martino was suspended for nine months after head butting Von Johnson on an August 2003 episode of MWF Xtra.

TIGER MULLIGAN - Mulligan could have as much reason to go after Dr. Von Johnson as anyone on this list.  The commissioner stripped Mulligan of the MWF Heavyweight Championship in September 2003 due to a knee injury.  Mulligan worked his way back to the squared circle only to be humiliated and fired by Von Johnson last Christmas.

ZACK CARTER - "Hee Hee" the referee endured many verbal attacks from Von Johnson, as he refers to him as New England's favorite homosexual referee.  Carter was also fired on CHRISTMAS CLASH, only to be reinstated by the MWF Board of Directors in March 2006.

KA HOKU - Von Johnson's dislike of Ka Hoku was apparent for a long time after incidents at several MWF live events.  He released Ka Hoku after missing a live event in November 2005.

CHUCK BREADMORE - Breadmore was in charge of the Braintree Moose Lodge.  Von Johnson challenged him to an arm wrestling match in December to take over the lodge and Breadmore no-showed the event.  It was later learned that he was sent a poisoned fruit basket for Christmas.  Johnny Fabulous announced that the commissioner was the winner and declared he was in charge of the lodge.  Breadmore was enraged and many felt Von Johnson sent him the poisoned fruit, which he denies. 

HEFF - Heff drove Von Johnson crazy since day one in the MWF when he struck him in the heart with his trusty club.  After a heated confrontation last summer, Heff received his walking papers from the doctor in August 2005.

DC DILLINGER - DC is another of the commissioner's least favorite people.  Von Johnson banned Dillinger from the MWF after an incident that took place at one of his friends live events!!  DC returned to the MWF on the June 2006 ULTRA, but he was unaccounted for on March 25th.

GARY GOLD - Gary felt humiliated when the commissioner announced that was pregnant with a baby on the January 2006 ULTRA.

JOHN REILLY - the Dennisport, MA native has been an enemy of the Commissioner's on Myspace for the past several months and the insults hurled back and forth have gotten nasty.

PAULIE GILMORE - another individual Von Johnson had a lot of contempt for going back to the days of Tony Rumble's NWA New England, claiming he had zero talent in the ring and never committed himself to getting in shape.  Could Gilmore's feet have hit the mark on March 25th?

THE IRON SHEIK - another hated enemy. The Sheik and the doctor went tit for tat at IRON SHEIK APPRECIATION NIGHT on August 5th, 2005 in Blackstone, MA.  As if that showdown wasn't bad enough, they were almost blown up when hit by a drunk driver headed back to Boston!  The battle continued at the hospital and didn't cease until five state troopers got involved at Logan Airport the next day.   The unpredictable Sheik has nothing but nasty things to say about Von Johnson and would certainly take joy in extracting revenge as he blamed the commish for the accident that night.